tumblr: that thing you like is Problematic and you should feel bad for liking it
me, an adult capable of critical thinking and criticizing things while still wholeheartedly enjoying them: please get out of my living room
Day: January 16, 2018
for the next Reboot That Makes Men Angry I’d like to submit for your consideration Lupita Nyong’o as Indiana Jones
and she steals artifacts from museums and returns them to their rightful cultures
Oh my god, imagine the Indiana Jones temple-robbing scenes in reverse! She walks through the Scorpion pit, she ducks under the swinging axe, she jumps the spike trap… She pulls the idol from her bag and gently places it back on the altar. Then she walks out without looking back while all around her, the temple settles back down into tranquility.
The beginning of the movie would start with a heist to rob the museum which would make it a double adventure heist movie.
and when she does archaeology, she’s a legit archaeologist
Indiana Jones and the Temple of NAGPRA Compliance
one thing me n my art loving gf would do is visit galleries and play a game called “root, loot or boot”
the gist is that you would look at a group of paintings in a room and decide which figure in the painting you’d root (fuck, in Australian slang), which painting you’d loot (steal and put on your wall at home) and which painting you’d boot (punt into the garbage because it’s shit and Not Art)
a couple of things about my experiences:
1. this game is a lot more fun if you’re attracted to women because there’s so many Hot Gals to choose from
2. if you are attracted to men, you will spend a lot of time going “well, looks like I’ll have to pick jesus again” as my bi gf did
3. it gets more complicated in modern art museums and you find yourself having saying, “I’d fuck the rhombus” “you CAN’T fuck the rhombus” “then I’ll fuck that blue squiggle thing. what’s it called?” “creeping existential dread in blue” “then does that mean I’m fucking the squiggle or am I getting fucked by the existential dread it represents?” “aren’t we all already getting fucked by existential dread?”
4. if you play this with an art history nerd, they may decide to kill you over one of your “boot” choices
5. you will get Disapproving Looks from other patrons who overhear your heated debates
6. it’s also the best fun you’ll ever have in an art gallery
this would be worth the drive up to minneapolis to play this at the institute
heads up i’m gonna fuck the entire chinese jade collection and boot every rothko, fight me
kototyph 