i want a jaynestown kinda thing w/ star trek where they land on a planet and yeah they’re pre-warp and pretty primitive but yeah fuck the prime directive because there’s like a plague there and bones isn’t going to let all those people die so he kinda sneaks the medicine and stuff to them and they leave and kirk is like “ok there’s pretty much no way we’re gonna get away with this so we were never here”
and then like ten years later they’re sent to check on a planet and whoops it’s the same planet that bones helped so kirk is like ok we go in, write a report and stuff, and get out and hope nobody notices us. and they beam down and there’s a giant goddamned temple dedicated to mccoy. paintings and sculptures and shit and it’s kinda crude but still clearly recognizable and they’re standing there in shock staring at this giant fuckin statue of mccoy like holy shit we are in so much trouble and spock just goes “this must be what going mad feels like.”
#jim is really jealous #spock can not even being to PROCESS how many goddamned rules they broke #sulu is just like we gotta go to the planet where I’M a god
“I think they really captured his essence.”
“He looks angry.”
“Yeah that’s kinda what I mean.”
– conversation between chekov and sulu
Day: July 11, 2015
why do people think bisexuality is confusing? it’s not.
you know what is confusing? bi annual. does it mean every two years or twice a year? no one knows.
Legendary
The best part is that that’s actually Jimmy Buffett.
my precious fatty
i hope the female ghostbusters is really successful and kicks off a trend of rebooting every cherished franchise w/ all female main characters.. Capitalism do this one good work for me please
the most sublimely ridiculous thing happened to me today
- I went to go get packages during my lunch break because my apartment manager is open from 8:00-5:00pm and I am at work 8:00-7:00pm
- it was all big bulky but pretty light stuff (for my bed; I have a longterm houseguest and gave her all the things that made my bed bearable for HER bed, and I’m tired of sleeping on a rock-hard mattress and a blanket the cat threw up on)
- I thought I could handle the one-block walk back to my place and so declined the use of their two-wheeler and strolled blithely off with my two stupidly large boxes
- about three steps out I realized I’d made a terrible mistake but had too much pride to go back
- my arms were fully extended and my fingers were cramping and it hurt so bad I had to keep stopping, people were staring and asking if I was okay, IT WAS THE FUCKING WORST
- about halfway there, I decided to combine the boxes’ contents, which would have made it easier if, y’know, I was still at my apartment manager’s and could have disposed of the empty box somewhere
- but no
- I was outside
- on the street
- there were witnesses
- and no cover
- I maybe could have shoved it under a car but I live in that part of DC where the security guards would have gotten pretty nervous about mysterious boxes under vehicles
- so how I just had an empty box I still had to carry and an even heavier one to maneuver around
- it was over ninety-five, I was sweating, I kept dropping the empty box because somehow it was even more awkward now that it was empty???
- the empty box was hurting my fingers and embarrassing me in public so I low-key beat the shit out of it to try and make it flat so I could tuck it under my arm but it refused to be that accommodating
- I finally left it smashed over the top of a public trash can a hundred feet away from my apartment, and struggled on with the other one, made it, then went back to work
- fast forward to this evening, me in bed in pajamas within the first .05 seconds of arriving home from work (at six! it’s a miracle!), and reviewing my amazon orders
- I realize, huh. My playstation game didn’t come
- but wait
- it was in the same package as my bedding
- I thought to myself, no way. I would have seen it. there’s no fucking way my game is in that half-collapsed EMPTY box I left metaphorically smoldering on top of that stupid blue trash can
- fifteen minutes later I was outside in my jimjams rescuing my poor but thankfully undamaged Journey from the cardboard innards of that fucking fucker
the moral of the story, kids, is damn my pride and also never trust a box
kototyph 