Rating: NC-17 Word Count: ~30k Warnings/Tags: Alternate Universe – Urban Fantasy, Alternate S04E01: Lazarus Rising, Horror, Macabre Themes, Human!Castiel, Demon!Dean, Hell: Oppa Dante Style, Seven Deadly Sins, Symbolism, Surreal Imagery, Canon-Typical Religious Mockery Summary: No matter what it says on their business cards, Castiel and every other animator knows that you can’t cheat the reaper: dead is dead, and resurrection is just a fairy tale from the Bible.
“dad, do i annoy you?”no, gabe, you speak your mind.“uriel said he bets i annoy you. but he’s a downer.”none of your brothers do this, and that’s the real downer. you have excellent stories. you’re very creative.“dad, why do we fight all the time?”there has to be a balance, y’know. you guys choose where the tipping point is.
i have really been liking the thought of fledgling!gabe and him going through his “pre-teen” and “teen” years–like, around that time he starts to get a little rebellious because chuck disappears for no reason, right after giving him a horn that has the ability to bring together all of the garrisons for battle even though he talked for hundreds of thousands of years about how much he hates the fighting
IT’S JUST SO CUTE TO THINK ABOUT and a little heart-crushing, but honestly, it fits in with the god’n’gabe stuff that exists up to this point;;;
Myths are stories about people who become too big for their lives temporarily, so that they crash into other lives or brush against the gods. In crisis, their souls are visible.
Anne Carson, “Tragedy: A Curious Art Form” (via femmechester)
I can only gleefully imagine the arduous decisive process on this one.
CW: [posts a random, congratulatory photo of Jared]
Meanwhile, in the writers room:
[heterosexual alert wailing in the distance]
“Jeremy, it’s been a whole hour already since we congratulated Jared, we have to respond to the… other one.”
“For bro’s sake, Robert, we’re trying! But every single shot of these two is just, y’know.”
“Pretty gay?”
“Yeah.”
“What about season 4? They’ve just met, it can’t be too bad.”
“Oh, it’s bad, Bob. It’s so bad. It had been before we realised the danger. They’re like animals. It’s disgusting.”
“What about season 7? Cas can’t even remember who Dean is and then he’s insane, right?”
“Oh Bob.”
“What.”
“I’d rather have you, cursed or not” is not exactly the epitome of straightness. Don’t even get me started on the Emmanuel fiasco, I told you, we should have let Eugenie and Brad handle this one. Maybe then we’d have some shots of Cas snogging Daphne.“
“And have Jensen watch it all with an even more crestfallen look?”
“Oh. Right.”
[angry heterosexual fuming]
“Maybe we should use the one from the burger da… meeting. Or something from Brokeba- from Purgatory. Or, you know, anything from season 8. They seem pretty straight to me.”
“You know what, Mysterious Intern That Should in No Way Have Right to Be at This Meeting, maybe you’re righ-”
“HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST YOUR MI- whatever. I give up. Just… crop them or something. No one will notice.”
kototyph 